Do you have any questions? The Daronne has the answers! (Yeah well, it’s not the best advice, but it does what it can, huh.) Welcome to this new installment of our heartfelt mail like no other.
La Daronne is the queen of not-so-silly advice wrapped in a touch of more or less subtle humor. Here she is back to save a reader!
My neighbors just had a baby. Yes! Congratulation! Except her baby cries all the time and it bothers me, especially at night. Because I sleep at night.
I can imagine it must be hard for a parent to live with, but I’m tired of hearing nonstop crying, how am I supposed to cope?
My Little Strawberry Mojito
Oh how I wish you hadn’t sent me that email. Answering something like this makes me feel like I’m summoning the 4 horsemen of the apocalypse. Among those who will whine that it’s a baby, at some point you have to be tolerant, the real victims are the parents! And those who will reply that it’s not up to them to take on the decisions of these dirty polluters who put down badly behaved children will be yelled at again.
Hearing a baby cry all night is hell for parents and neighbors alike, but neighbors can also argue they didn’t ask. Neither did the parents, but they still knew they were putting themselves in danger. Result of races, all shit except some shit 100% surprising and others say 50% surprising.
To respond to this divisive letter, I did a little more internet research to see what the law says about it, and I found two things:
– If noise at night is penalized, babies’ cries are not considered such and, overall, your neighbors are not risking anything.
– People are seriously ill and I have read the testimonies of young parents whose neighbor played loud music at night to prevent the baby from sleeping to “get revenge on him”.
Life in society is spoiled, I repeat it every week
Does living in society force us to face the consequences of other people’s decisions and justify being annoyed by other people’s children? You have two hours. I personally think there are no right answers. On the one hand, I agree, you don’t have to pay for other people’s eagerness to reproduce, but on the other hand, you can’t stop people from reproducing if they want to.
That said, it’s pretty hopeless. A bit like the presidential elections in view of the climate issue, with the role of capitalism, the baby that annoys you all and who doesn’t give a damn about the steaks in your neighborhood disputes, because in the end it’s always whoever decides.
Since I’m nice, I’ll still try to help you improve the situation until your neighbors’ chubby angel gets a little bigger and stops roaring.
Things not to do (most of the time):
- Confront your neighbors to bitch. And take the opportunity to give them some parenting advice, because guiding a two-month-old is still super easy and you’d have to be really clumsy not to pull it off. Luckily you are there to tell them to stop hugging him as soon as he cries or he will never stop.
- Call the police for noise at night, enter a noise contest with the baby.
- Push anonymous threats into your neighbors’ inboxes.
Editor’s note: It gives you a nice leg, but know it: your neighbors already feel like big poops when their cherub roars and pisses the whole building off. Your life sucks right now. Don’t be the person who shoots at ambulances.
Things to do:
- If you hear the little angel as if you were in his room, the cabin’s insulation is probably not optimal. Now it’s time to talk to the landlord about it or put on carpets/rugs/noise paint. Invest in earplugs too and if the parents can’t move the child’s sleeping place, consider (if possible) a time to sleep in a different room and equip yourself with earplugs. And if you’re reluctant to do all this, because after all” You didn’t ask anyone “Moving is still the best solution. No, it’s not fair, but I repeat: you can get angry as much as you want, the baby has the last word and believe in my many years of experience, no one has ever managed to hear a baby’s reason. It’s in vain.
- As much as a judgment or criticism of your crying child is (really) unwelcome, it is important to ask factually whether you can also try to isolate your living space as much as possible (carpet/rug/bis) and apparently completely change the baby’s room acceptable for me.
- And while we’re at it, be friendly. Take the opportunity to ask them if they need anything. Shopping, small service and why not babysitting while they rest. Maybe one day they’ll return the favor. And then it’s also cool to be nice for free.
Well I’ll leave you, I’ll visit a house deep in the forest to settle there with the Daron (or maybe even without him),
Dear Daronne, how do I silence my noisy neighbor without ending up in jail?
Photo credit Image by a: Pixabay